Have you ever had a pair of pants that were so comfy, it felt like you had clouds hugging the lower half of your body? Well I never did. Let me tell you about my previous pairs of pants (This is going to get exciting so hold on to the seat of your pants. See what I did there? You’re welcome).
I own a pair of Express jeans. Never bought pants from them before but I have bought their shirts. They make good shirts. They fit my Asian Small (Versus American Small) body. So I think, “Hey, they got shirts figured out, how about pants?” Apparently they didn’t pass that class. I have never worn a pair of jeans so uncomfortable. How uncomfortable, Jon? Well, imagine if your pair of pants were lined with Velcro but not the soft part. But they were on sale (Yea, I know. I’m stupid) and I figure, well they are new jeans and just need to be broken in. I wore them for about 6 months. Broken in? Nope! Still the same stiff piece of sand paper I had bought six months ago. So moral of this story? Don’t get jeans at Express and don’t fall for their sales (I’m looking at you never ending “Buy 1 Get One ½ Off”).
So then my next pair I think, well I went cheap on pants and I got what I paid for. Let’s go buy fancy pants and make an investment into some nice jeans (The blog is called “Reasons I am Broke.” Just wanted to remind you…). I make my way to a Banana Republic. Find some jeans and drop the dollars and walk out. I didn’t even try them on cause more money means better, right? I put them on when I got home, and they were nice. On the comfy scale I would give them brand new PJs, comfortable but definitely not the comfort of PJs with some mileage (I’m real big on PJs btw. They even match). As time goes on, I can see that they are starting to wear out pretty quickly. Then one dark and stormy night….I was coming home from work and in my way was a river. Yes, a river (That’s how stormy it was).
But I think, “Hey, I’m agile and shit.”
No, Jon don’t jump it!
“Hey! I got this!”
I didn’t have it.
I leaped, slipped, and fell.
You know that feeling of when you fall into a river and still have to walk home covered in water and your shoes are like tiny ponds. Well it’s not fun. But back to the pants. I get home and hang up my pants since they are drenched and to my dismay, a rip. I ripped my pants and not the fun time, Sponge Bob signing songs, ripped pants. Seriously pants? I dropped dollars on you. You were the chosen one!
Hey Express pants…
With one pair out of commission and my other pair the pants they probably hand out when people arrive to Hell, I needed to find new pants. This brings me to Uniqlo, the paradise of pants. I walk in and learning my lessons from before, I try on a pair of jeans. If legs could smile, it would be because of these jeans (Smiling legs. There’s an image for you to go to sleep with). For $50 and free alterations, this was amazing. I didn’t stop there. Tried on some Chino and if there was a need for the perfect summertime pants, these were the pants (Summertime pants: When you don’t want wear shorts but also don’t enjoy the feeling of sweaty legs in jeans). Not enough comfort for you? Then Uniqlo also has Male Jeggings. So if you want to feel like you’re wearing PJs, then go crazy (I was too disoriented with the comfort and flexibility. You shouldn’t be able to do yoga in jeans). You want great pants, Uniqlo is the business. Express? Not the business.
Reasons You Are Broke: Where do you like to buy pants? Anything you would recommend and not recommend? Leave a comment below and feel free to follow me (I’m into that).